Aug. 31, 2017 Overdose Awareness Day
Little one and I headed out yesterday morning to our local FED UP rally. She is a junior this year and taking U.S. Government so this was a perfect example of community members making their voices be heard. Of the rights of free assembly and freedom of speech.
Of course, more than that though, our motivation came from somewhere much deeper. I thought of all of your children that I have prayed for through the years of writing this blog, the mom's who have emailed me their stories, and then the email to say, "my child is gone. Their fight is over." I thought of all of us who live with the knowledge that we could be next.
Today was a compassionate voice, one of hope and advocacy for those who can't fight for themselves. For those who remain so stuck. I heard so many good things spoken today. I met several local moms who I have known online from a "mom's group," who bravely shared their stories with the news media that was present.
My girl met us there and sat and listened to the stories, to the compassionate voices that were acknowledging the fierce battle that those with an addiction fight every single day.
The opiate epidemic is unlike anything we have seen in our history. It is changing the face of recovery. Today Melinda, the director of Harm Reduction Services, which is where my girl and I received our Naloxone and training, said that "recovery is a spectrum." We need to broaden our sense of what recovery is. It is often someone just fighting to stay alive. She shared that when she was stuck in her addiction, homeless and living on the streets, "her body was not her own." Life didn't begin to change until someone told her she was worth saving, she was worth living a different life and that it was possible.
Another young man shared that medication assisted treatment must become more accepted in the world of recovery when its needed. That we have to stop shooting our wounded and keep working with them.
It made me think of when I first walked into Alanon....I was a different person than I am today. I came in paralyzed with fear, broken in spirit, I felt so much shame that all of my efforts to pull my daughter from this disease had failed.
Today, thanks to working a program for the last 12 years, thanks to those around me reaching out and extending a hand and saying, "I get it," to those who listened and didn't correct me, but let me figure out my own path, thanks to each of them, I have learned about living in a place of acceptance, of surrendering my will, of giving my girl her dignity, of letting go of my fear driven control, I have learned how to live more gently without judgements and finger pointing and blaming. Yes, none of us can do it "right" or well in the beginning but people who are farther along than us, keep working with us. They don't shame us for making mistakes, they dont treat us like we are a lost cause because we trip and fall. Just like someone coming in off the streets or from a long term addiction....recovery is a long process. It is not a one time decision and they have it. It is a million decisions made over and over again and sometimes they lose their footing. The important thing is to encourage them to keep coming back. Brush yourself off, come back, let us walk with you, you are not alone. Love someone when they can't love themselves.
Some of the things the FED UP coalition is working for is funding for research and treatment, for Narcan to be readily available....if someone is prescribed an opiate it is accompanied with Narcan, for immediate beds to be available. Expecting our heroin addicted kids to wait for 3 months for a bed to become available, to call every day, to show up at this office and put your name on a list, is literally impossible for so many of our kids who are homeless, with no money, without transportation and a phone. Its easier to just take their chances and keep using!
I remember right after we brought my girl home and she was applying for a medi-cal bed after she had aged out of our insurance. There were so many hoops she had to jump through....her therapist said, "These obstacles are too challenging for her at this point. I dont see how she can do this on her own." I knew then that this was a kind and realistic man who was on our side. I also felt like I had been given permission to HELP her! He wasn't going to lecture me about co-dependency and enabling... he got it. He understood how grave our situation was. I was so grateful and felt so validated.
Our addicted kids need love and encouragement and so do we. Our kids need affordable, easily accessible, appropriate and lengthy medical and psychological care. Desperately. We all know the multiple layers to our children's addictions that all must be addressed reliably and tenaciously. All of us, our families, our kids, our state leaders, doctors, are finding our way through the most unfathomable situation, but we must keep moving forward in kindness and banish these underlying messages of failure and shame and worthlessness that are so often perpetuated.
God bless us all as we go about just doing today. Much love to my parent readers....my heart is always with you. Annette
Of course, more than that though, our motivation came from somewhere much deeper. I thought of all of your children that I have prayed for through the years of writing this blog, the mom's who have emailed me their stories, and then the email to say, "my child is gone. Their fight is over." I thought of all of us who live with the knowledge that we could be next.
Today was a compassionate voice, one of hope and advocacy for those who can't fight for themselves. For those who remain so stuck. I heard so many good things spoken today. I met several local moms who I have known online from a "mom's group," who bravely shared their stories with the news media that was present.
My girl met us there and sat and listened to the stories, to the compassionate voices that were acknowledging the fierce battle that those with an addiction fight every single day.
The opiate epidemic is unlike anything we have seen in our history. It is changing the face of recovery. Today Melinda, the director of Harm Reduction Services, which is where my girl and I received our Naloxone and training, said that "recovery is a spectrum." We need to broaden our sense of what recovery is. It is often someone just fighting to stay alive. She shared that when she was stuck in her addiction, homeless and living on the streets, "her body was not her own." Life didn't begin to change until someone told her she was worth saving, she was worth living a different life and that it was possible.
Another young man shared that medication assisted treatment must become more accepted in the world of recovery when its needed. That we have to stop shooting our wounded and keep working with them.
It made me think of when I first walked into Alanon....I was a different person than I am today. I came in paralyzed with fear, broken in spirit, I felt so much shame that all of my efforts to pull my daughter from this disease had failed.
Today, thanks to working a program for the last 12 years, thanks to those around me reaching out and extending a hand and saying, "I get it," to those who listened and didn't correct me, but let me figure out my own path, thanks to each of them, I have learned about living in a place of acceptance, of surrendering my will, of giving my girl her dignity, of letting go of my fear driven control, I have learned how to live more gently without judgements and finger pointing and blaming. Yes, none of us can do it "right" or well in the beginning but people who are farther along than us, keep working with us. They don't shame us for making mistakes, they dont treat us like we are a lost cause because we trip and fall. Just like someone coming in off the streets or from a long term addiction....recovery is a long process. It is not a one time decision and they have it. It is a million decisions made over and over again and sometimes they lose their footing. The important thing is to encourage them to keep coming back. Brush yourself off, come back, let us walk with you, you are not alone. Love someone when they can't love themselves.
Some of the things the FED UP coalition is working for is funding for research and treatment, for Narcan to be readily available....if someone is prescribed an opiate it is accompanied with Narcan, for immediate beds to be available. Expecting our heroin addicted kids to wait for 3 months for a bed to become available, to call every day, to show up at this office and put your name on a list, is literally impossible for so many of our kids who are homeless, with no money, without transportation and a phone. Its easier to just take their chances and keep using!
I remember right after we brought my girl home and she was applying for a medi-cal bed after she had aged out of our insurance. There were so many hoops she had to jump through....her therapist said, "These obstacles are too challenging for her at this point. I dont see how she can do this on her own." I knew then that this was a kind and realistic man who was on our side. I also felt like I had been given permission to HELP her! He wasn't going to lecture me about co-dependency and enabling... he got it. He understood how grave our situation was. I was so grateful and felt so validated.
Our addicted kids need love and encouragement and so do we. Our kids need affordable, easily accessible, appropriate and lengthy medical and psychological care. Desperately. We all know the multiple layers to our children's addictions that all must be addressed reliably and tenaciously. All of us, our families, our kids, our state leaders, doctors, are finding our way through the most unfathomable situation, but we must keep moving forward in kindness and banish these underlying messages of failure and shame and worthlessness that are so often perpetuated.
God bless us all as we go about just doing today. Much love to my parent readers....my heart is always with you. Annette
Comments
Fed Up is a mild descriptor of feelings as a person battling this monster on the front lines with so little to show for my efforts.
Sorry, just had to rant.
Holly