I told you all how I had made the difficult decision to let my farthest away client go all in the name of being home more. Those changes go into affect at the first of the year. I haven't even had any time off yet and one of my other clients has taken very ill and her family is wondering if I have filled the extra time. The goal was to NOT fill the extra time. Oh what to do what to do. I have been with this little woman for 5 years. I love her. It is so freaking hard to say no. Especially to this wonderful little friend. We will figure it out....but little one is a huge priority right now. My first priority.
Tonight I listened to a program friend share her heartbreak. As an outsider looking in, as I listened to her sob, there was so much that seemed clear to me, that she couldn't see. She spoke of lots of voices, advice, direction, from all around her and she was so confused.
The unending battle we wage between tough love and compassion. This is a woman of faith, so I could say this to her......WWJD? That sounds so trite and so silly, but I do think of that with my girl. What would Jesus do? Jesus loved the unlovely, He gathered in the broken and sick, the sinful, the lepers and He loved them as they were, He made them whole again. He didn't expect them to put themselves together and make themselves acceptable to Him. He wanted them-us to come as we are. He came for the broken. He loves misfits.
The Jesus I know would not enable, but He would love freely. He would have compassion, He would accept her as she came to Him and would begin to build from there if she was open to that. If not He would continue to wait for her to be ready. He would not abandon, shun, shame, blame, be angry....He would walk with her, bathe her in His love and care and wash away all of the hurt places and heal her broken spirit.
Just like He will do for my friend's loved one. For you, for me, for my girl, for any one of us.
This Christmas I am finding such peace in the idea that I am not in charge. My only job is to keep loving my girl. That comes naturally, thats the easy stuff.
My second job is to stay out of the way of the process. Accepting my lack of control over the outcome, makes even that, more bearable.
Merry Christmas everyone......
PS: Another essential oil story....Mollys cat got bit by another cat on the foot. It swelled up and he wouldn't put any weight on it. It finally burst open and became an abscess. We don't do vets for things like that...our feed stores carry lots of vet supplies and I can give injections of antibiotics if I need to and carry out basic first aide. So this time, after we used a warm wet wash cloth and got out as much yuk as we could, I used Thieves oil 2-3x a day on his little foot. I wrapped it with a non-stick pad and then sports tape. After 24 hours the swelling was gone. After 48 hours, he was putting weight on his foot. Now, 4 days later, the wound is closed and healing and Finn is back to his old feisty self. I am so excited about all that I am learning about the oils. We all are sleeping so well. The dad is pain free. My PMS is 100x better.....even though I find it a little ironic that I finally find a solution at the end of that time in my life. lol All of those years of bitchiness....God only knows what purpose they served, besides making the dad a patient man.