This has been the most relaxing holiday. I am just finishing up five wonderful days off and its back to the "grind" later tonight. I am tired of all of the driving.....I wish I could teleport! LOL (I had to ask little one what that was called.)
I prepared for the holiday for a couple days, but I didn't flip out about company cleaning and I just kept repeating, "we are who we are." "It is what it is." This year I felt a lot of acceptance for where we are at in life, and not because everything is so wonderful. Quite the contrary. However, despite the challenges and obstacles that we face, it was rather nice to just stop obsessing and let it all be. When I can acknowledge my powerlessness and that *I* will not be the one who changes anything for any of us it helps me to stop trying and to just live in the moment of what is.
So the new boyfriend came but his mom opted out at the last minute. She has a lot of physical ailments and I think maybe she got nervous. We told the young man, its ok. We understand getting nervous, feeling anxiety, and maybe she just didn't want to come.....we get that! I told him we will try again when its not a major holiday.....just casual, pop in (after you drive 40 miles to get here) and have a cup of coffee and a treat.....laid back, no pressure to be our holiday best, for any of us! Hopefully we can meet her one day.
My girl came too and it was a nice visit. She had dinner, took a nap in my bed, and then went back out to her people. I sent tons of leftovers with her and it was ok. The whole visit was what we have for today and I was ok with it. I miss her and I thought about last year when she was the house manager at her recovery house and making a little money and was clean and sober for several months.....we met for breakfast in the city and went Christmas shopping. It was the most perfectly normal day.....an adult daughter out Christmas shopping with her mom. She chose gifts for everyone and bought them with her own money. We talked recovery, we shared our hearts, we laughed, we had fun. Part way through that day I thought to myself, "Imbed this in your memory. This day is a treasure and you don't know how many of these you will get."
Oh one more thing.....my essential oil journey. It is really fascinating. The dad says he really is feeling better. I have been giving him a capsule with 5 drops coipaba, 5 drops turmeric, and 5 drops rosemary in it. One in the morning and one at night. I have also use it on him topically. The dad has degenerative disc disease and herniated discs. He has had some repaired surgically, but there are still some that are in bad shape with nerve damage. After years as a skiier he took up snowboarding to be with little one and his hip has now been hurting. He has lived with chronic pain since his early 30's and to his credit I have to say, he doesn't take pain meds. He has anti-inflammatories but is concerned with the long term effects on his vital organs....so takes them very sparingly. We know so many people who hurt their backs and then got addicted to pain meds and their lives were ruined.....ruined marriages, careers, on and on.....we all know the stories. I respect him so much for not going there. Our kids have grown up walking on his back to get the knots out, buying him those vibrating cushion things for gifts for his commute, changing his diet (which he is not very co-operative with) to reduce inflammation...his back stuff has been a big part of our lives since Molly was born when he had a major injury that ended his construction career and set us off in a new direction with technology. Who knew he was naturally gifted in that field and that what seemed to be so awful, was actually a blessing in disguise.We just never know how everything will play out and that.....is my hope. A miracle could be waiting right around the corner for any of us.