Sunday, November 30, 2014

Relaxing = feeling peaceful and rested

This has been the most relaxing holiday. I am just finishing up five wonderful days off and its back to the "grind" later tonight. I am tired of all of the driving.....I wish I could teleport! LOL (I had to ask little one what that was called.)

I prepared for the holiday for a couple days, but I didn't flip out about company cleaning and I just kept repeating, "we are who we are." "It is what it is." This year I felt a lot of acceptance for where we are at in life, and not because everything is so wonderful. Quite the contrary. However, despite the challenges and obstacles that we face, it was rather nice to just stop obsessing and let it all be. When I can acknowledge my powerlessness and that *I* will not be the one who changes anything for any of us it helps me to stop trying and to just live in the moment of what is.

So the new boyfriend came but his mom opted out at the last minute. She has a lot of physical ailments and I think maybe she got nervous. We told the young man, its ok. We understand getting nervous, feeling anxiety, and maybe she just didn't want to come.....we get that! I told him we will try again when its not a major holiday.....just casual, pop in (after you drive 40 miles to get here) and have a cup of coffee and a treat.....laid back, no pressure to be our holiday best, for any of us! Hopefully we can meet her one day.

My girl came too and it was a nice visit. She had dinner, took a nap in my bed, and then went back out to her people. I sent tons of leftovers with her and it was ok. The whole visit was what we have for today and I was ok with it. I miss her and I thought about last year when she was the house manager at her recovery house and making a little money and was clean and sober for several months.....we met for breakfast in the city and went Christmas shopping. It was the most perfectly normal adult daughter out Christmas shopping with her mom. She chose gifts for everyone and bought them with her own money. We talked recovery, we shared our hearts, we laughed, we had fun. Part way through that day I thought to myself, "Imbed this in your memory. This day is a treasure and you don't know how many of these you will get."

Oh one more essential oil journey. It is really fascinating. The dad says he really is feeling better. I have been giving him a capsule with 5 drops coipaba, 5 drops turmeric, and 5 drops rosemary in it. One in the morning and one at night. I have also use it on him topically. The dad has degenerative disc disease and herniated discs. He has had some repaired surgically, but there are still some that are in bad shape with nerve damage. After years as a skiier he took up snowboarding to be with little one and his hip has now been hurting. He has lived with chronic pain since his early 30's and to his credit I have to say, he doesn't take pain meds. He has anti-inflammatories but is concerned with the long term effects on his vital takes them very sparingly. We know so many people who hurt their backs and then got addicted to pain meds and their lives were ruined.....ruined marriages, careers, on and on.....we all know the stories. I respect him so much for not going there. Our kids have grown up walking on his back to get the knots out, buying him those vibrating cushion things for gifts for his commute, changing his diet (which he is not very co-operative with) to reduce inflammation...his back stuff has been a big part of our lives since Molly was born when he had a major injury that ended his construction career and set us off in a new direction with technology. Who knew he was naturally gifted in that field and that what seemed to be so awful, was actually a blessing in disguise.We just never know how everything will play out and my hope. A miracle could be waiting right around the corner for any of us.

Many blessings.....


Topper said...

Ah write my heart. I never fail to relate to your posts. My addict son spends another holiday in criminal justice rehab....i love your acceptance for the way it is. Thank you.

Mrs. Dubose said...

What a lovely post. I am so happy that you sound so peaceful. Many blessings to you, Annette and your lovely family too.

Tell me more about the essential oils for chronic pain!!


Signe said...

Annette, you're that beautiful flower that pushes it's way up through the crack in the cement and makes everything around it look bright and hopeful. I love the positive and faithful outlook you have. I'm happy your day was happy and that you had that treasure of a memory to return to and cherish. Bless you!

Anonymous said...

I will echo what the others above me have too but I think my favorite part of your writing is that I find it very calming. I too, have experienced that moment of being next to my son in a yoga class. Just to be there with him after everything we've been through. I just appreciated that moment so much. Thank You for keeping your blog going, it helps so much.

Tori said...

Isn't it nice to be able to have a good holiday even while our children are using? Never thought I would say that!

I think I told you that in school we had to study vitamins and I became absolutely fascinated. That is what B got for his birthday a bunch of vitamins with a schedule and he actually just started taking them.

So now I want to learn about the oils!