Tuesday, August 27, 2013

California Is on Fire

Large parts of Northern California have been on fire this past week. This picture to the right is of the air near my house...beyond those trees is usually a view of a grand forest. The smoke is so thick its like fog. P.E has been cancelled, soccer practice has been cancelled, I haven't been able to walk....however, when I think of all of our firefighters out there fighting to save everything and the people who have lost their homes and all of their possessions, I hush my big mouth.

Our house is the last house at the end of a two lane road....with only one way in or out. A couple days a week little one is home alone for an hour after school, and I started thinking about if there was an evacuation. In our area they have a recorded call service that goes out to all residents. I thought about what she would do. Our neighbors are all spread out. I told her I would teach her how to drive our old Subaru that we keep as a back up car and in case of an emergency she could leave. She was thrilled with that idea! She started planning immediately....she would pack up the three dogs into the car, "the cats will have to run away because I can't have the dogs AND the cats in the car all at once and there probably won't be time to go back and make two trips." I told her SHE was the first priority...if she had to, open the gate and let the dogs run free too. We talked about the back way out which is a dirt road with a break away chain across it and to use that if she needed to, to drive through the chain, don't stop. Oh the thrill! So we have our emergency plan in place. A small bag packed wouldn't be a bad idea either.

So thanks to Sherry's inspiration over at Oh For the Love of Me I am trying the Whole 30 eating plan for 30 days. Yesterday was my first day and after talking with Sherry we decided that I could keep cream in my coffee if that made this doable for me....even though the plan contains NO dairy. The good news is that Molly and I went out for her non-drinking (cuz I'm crazy like that) birthday dinner at Olive Garden. I was nervous... I could smell all of that garlic and butter, and bread sticks, and then we debated about ordering an appetizer that was cheesy fondue to dip your bread into....I wouldn't have been able to handle that, so we didn't get it. Not one bread stick passed my lips, I had a mixed grill of skewered chicken and steak and vegetables in a rosemary glaze sauce. It was really good....and probably the only thing I really did wrong was portion control. One each of the steak and the chicken would have been fine.....but noooo. I had to eat all 4....2 of each! The plate to the left is my breakfast...a 2 egg omelet filled with spinach, mushroom, avocado and a sprinkle of fat free feta cheese. Yes the FF feta is a cheat...but barely!

As to my meltdown....turns out it WAS a hormonal surge! Hmph, whadd'ya know?! It did reveal to me though that I do still have work to do on MY baggage. I started reading From Survival to Recovery and my daily reader Hope for Today....both are Alanon literature thats focus is the adult child of alcoholics.

Molly and I had a wonderful dinner together. We talked about it all, I owned my part, she owned her's, she acknowledged how heavy mine must feel to me....I love that girl. She then told me a story about a homeless man who used to come into the restaurant that she works in. He would order coffee with a TON of french vanilla creamer. She said she had given him a ride in one rainy day on her way to work and he was nice, coherent, and appreciative. (I chose not to address the issue of giving strangers rides right then. We are still fragile after my last fear driven upset.) Anyway, she and her boyfriend walked down to the corner store the other night near their house and noticed a "crazy" man out side raving and ranting. It ended up being her homeless friend and she said she now knew why he hadn't been in for so long....he had totally lost it. He asked for some money as she went by and she asked if she could get him a coffee. He said, "yes." She offered, "with French Vanilla, right?" He looked at her, and as she walked into the store, he remembered and yelled out...."Hey! I know you!" She brought him back a large coffee with a small cup filled with french vanilla creamer....and he held her hand and told her how much he appreciated it, how nice she had always been to him, how good it was to see her.

I love that story. Even if it hadn't been my daughter who showed him some kindness, I love that he felt seen. I love that she knew that little fact about him, what kind of creamer he likes, I love that those small acts of kindness broke through his delusion and let them connect. She told me it was a powerful experience for her. The thought of her standing there holding his filthy hand makes me tear up.

"And the King will say, 'I tell you the truth, when you did it to one of the least of these my brothers and sisters, you were doing it to me!' Matthew 25:40

Ok All.....I'm on my way back to sanity. Truly, this has been an exhausting week though. My emotions, my head is aching, changing my eating habits, work work work and thick smoke everywhere! 

Bless you all for being so sweet to me in your comments. 


beachteacher said...

Wow - stay safe ! Good thinking in your plan for your youngest. And good going on the diet plan too ! I've had to regroup after my big trip this summer & going off track & staying off track for quite awhile after my return. But have you ever done just low carb ? As in -- don't worry about fat ? Fat doesn't male us fat,..I swear. Don't fear the fat - not in the food anyway. Just keep blood sugar low & you'll lose weight. The sugar is the problem -- & of course,..that's in so much - besides the typical sugary foods. I lost 29 lb.s without any cutting out of fat or concern about calorie count - but didn't eat sugar flour or grain. Oh wait -- now this is funny,..l'm so brain dead ! We had this convo before,,,didn't we ? I'm so sorry - please forgive my forgetful brain. LOL. it just came back to me. And no - I wasn't perfect about the diet - at times,...but not frequently ,..I'd cheat & have some popcorn. I do know - after the 4th day -- definitely after the 5th - you lose the craving & it gets much much easier. That reminds me of drug detox -- obviously not as severe at all -- but how once it's out of your body,..it changes how you feel. Helga has a lot of good low carb sites she posts- and there are so many delicious things to eat that are awesome. Like last night,..I had spaghetti squash with Alfredo sauce -- it was wonderful ! Low carb, high fat -- but I was down a pound this morning. And there are even bread alternatives & substitutes with other kinds of flour like almond & coconut - that you can make or buy already made. Anyway -- I'll step down off my soapbox now,..and please forgive the rant ! Btw - my cholesterol got better doing what I just described too. : ). Hang in there -- you're the best !

SoberMomWrites said...

Oh my God...then next time you even THINK that you're not a good enough mom, I want you to remember that story. Because the woman who raised that wonderful, kind and caring young woman must be an amazing person herself. Just sayin'. (And thanks a lot to you and Molly for making me cry at work...ugh!)

So glad you've started!!! I wouldn't worry about portion control right now. The thing with protein is that your body tells you to stop way before it does with carbs. I ate a TON of protein when I started (three eggs in the morning, whole chicken breasts for lunch and dinner and sometimes for snack!) But I've noticed now that I don't need as much to feel full. I'm backing it off all by myself. Go figure!

Oh my that Molly story is one I will carry with me for a very long time.

Thank you.


dawn said...

Good work with restraint of tongue when Molly shared the rid/car thing!

You went to Olive Garden on a diet? ARE YOU OUT OF YOUR MIND???!!!!!!!!! Incidentally, whatdoyasay you and Sherry, and I this time, all do the 30 deal. You guys will start over for me,,

right?? !!??? :@/

Mary Christine said...

Please stay safe! And fire, stay away from my friend and her loved ones!

I've been doing paleo for a couple of weeks. I have not lost weight, but I feel 1,000% better. No more bloating, no more stomach ache, no more tiredness!

Syd said...

Hope that you will be safe from the fires. Good luck on the diet. We don't do eggs, dairy, corn, wheat, refined sugar, peanuts, soy. Sort of a version of the Palaeo diet.

Her Big Sad said...

Having a go bag is a great idea. Our kids had them in the back of their cars. always there, always ready if needed. complete change of clothes, travel size products, towel, and a few heat stable snacks... I can't count the number of times we've be on alert for a fire - but we've only packed the vans once - when the flames were literally in the back yard of a home six houses away. We didn't end up leaving - grateful! Teaching the little one to drive that car is a good idea! :)

My oldest daughter hit the 30 pounds down mark yesterday, on Paleo, actually fairly close to whole 30, except she does use goat cheese on occasion. Just knocking those grains, refined sugars, and unpronouncable ingredients out has made the difference for her - she has not walked one single stop of exercise, but hopes to change that! She uses honey in things like homemade BBQ sauce, but sparingly. It's working for her and I'm so happy to see her taking care of herself that way. Hope your air clears soon and you can get back to walking. We have no fires down here, I am without excuse. After my first burst of energy Monday, I've been dragging around here and not going up to the reservoir to walk. There may be a connection between my lethargy and my lack of exercise.... duh. Hugs!

Signe said...

I hope you and your family are safe. I don't want to imagine that kind of threat. Very scary to me. I did laugh, though, as you talked about you and your daughter discussing how to drive the car and what to do. I love that despite the whirl wind around you, you can still appreciate the moment.