Sunday, November 29, 2015

One to go. LOL

Thanksgiving is over and I am thankful. No family picture this time...

Big brother and his girlfriend spent several days with us and it was so fun. Ive missed my big boy so much. They taught me how to play Mexican Train Dominoes...we played lots of games. Molly and her new boyfriend were here also and that was wonderful. None of us laugh as much as when Molly is around. Little one taught us Japanese phrases that we could lob at each other during our domino games and then the food.....we ate like there was no tomorrow! I made a simplified dinner.....turkey, mashed potatoes, gravy, stuffing, and a big salad with cheese and pecans. Home made pumpkin pies with real whipped cream. Chocolate cream pies, big breakfasts with avocado and cheese omelets and bacon. The dad was my ever faithful assistant, taking out trash, cleaning up dishes, wiping down counters and then telling me to stop working so hard so I could come and play games with them.

Addiction was alive and well too though. It always has to leave its big ugly mark....but we navigated around it and had a lot of enjoyable moments too. As the mom, the times that addiction touched are so sad to me. Not just for my girl, but for her dad and I, for her siblings. I watch their reactions....they range from resignation, to acceptance, to resentment and anger, and lots of fear swirling around underneath everything. I thought about all of the energy that I was expending thinking about my girl, verifying that she was safe wherever she was, and being present enough to play games, cook, get clean sheets on beds as everyone came and went and smile and enjoy the ones I was with. I could at least give myself credit for all of that...

I am doing an online bible study with some friends and all of the scriptures have been about Jesus being our Shepherd and our provider.... for everything we need. I can't begin to tell you how comforting these scriptures have been.

I will end with these verses....I cry every time I read them. They of course apply to us all, but I think of the angels rejoicing at the return of my girl and....well, I'm waiting for that day.

Now all the tax-gatherers and the sinners were coming near Him to listen to Him.
And both the Pharisees and the scribes (the most religious among them) began to grumble, saying, "This man receives sinners and eats with them."
And He told them this parable, saying,
"What man among you, if he has a hundred sheep and has lost one of them, does not leave the ninety-nine in the open pasture, and go after the one which is lost, until he finds it?
And when he has found it, he lays it on his shoulders rejoicing.
And when he comes home, he calls together his friends and his neighbors, saying to them, 'Rejoice with me, for I have found my sheep which was lost!'
I tell you that in the same way, there will be more joy in heaven over one sinner who repents, than over ninety-nine righteous persons who need no repentance."  Luke 15:1-7

Fill each momma who reads here with the peace that you see her child. They are not lost to You.

Much love,



Anonymous said...

I am having a difficult time tonight. I came here to read your blog and am so moved by your patience and kindness. I know God asks me to be thankful for all my circumstances, especially during difficult times and that is what I'm struggling with tonight. It's been 10 long years of addiction and my son still struggles. I pray for some peace and some closure. This is a terrible way to live. Thank you for always writing from the heart, it touches me deeply.

Anonymous said...

Thank you for this post Annette ... just what I needed to read today.
Actually, thank you for all your posts .. you help more than you could ever realize.


Anonymous said...

This made me cry.

Anonymous said...

Another great post. And your last line just touches my heart. Thank you