What on earth could I have had to say for 800 posts?! And some of you have been here reading from the very beginning....2007! I have gone through all sorts of times with this blog...I have often wondered why I continue to spill my life out onto this screen for all to dissect and read. God only knows what people really think...but I have learned that that is none of my business. I can keep blogging until the day I decide I am done and I can talk about whatever I want, as long as I am not causing harm with my words. So here I still am. lol
I am fat again y'all. Remember back in 2012 when I went through that huge transformation and the stretching (ripping) of my comfort zone and going to see "little Miss Cutie Pie." I lost 50lbs. I have now gained 40 back. I have been living in my addiction off and on this past year or so and I will tell you that my food addiction, my coping mechanism of comforting myself with food, gives me so much compassion for our addicted kids. Because even when I set out to do what is right, even when I have a plan and I try do the very things I *want* to do...which is eat healthy and exercise and be healthy....the smallest thing can trip me up and I veer off the road of my food sobriety. I have said it many times.....my girl and I are more alike than we are different.
So I hired a new personal trainer who happens to be a dear old friend of mine. I love the times we get to see each other and now I get to see her once a week religiously at 6:30 every Saturday morning. I was there yesterday and it was good. No tears (if you were around for 2012 you will remember I sobbed my way through the first few weeks of getting going) but we did laugh a lot, talked about our kids (she was pregnant with twin girls who are 3 months younger than my Little One,) talked about our goals, and I felt comfortable.
Yes, I'm fat. So what?! ISIS is beheading people...how important is it that I am fat again? Not very....to anyone but me. So for my own physical health I am once again setting out to get strong again. That is my biggest regret...letting all of that muscle go! I loved feeling strong and fit. It wasn't even about being skinny. Although that part was fun too.
I am attempting to use a new eating plan called "Trim Healthy Mama" which so far has felt far too difficult and complicated for me to figure out. Today I spent the day trying some recipes out.....I used my spiral cutter thingy and cut zucchinis and sweet potatoes and then drizzled them with olive oil and garlic salt and pepper and baked for 12 minutes at 400 degrees. Yum. I made a quinoa salad with quinoa that was cooked in chicken broth, I added lots of vegetables and some black olives, and some 0 carb organic balsamic dressing. I also made a drink called "The Shrinker." LOL Its not bad....not as good as diet coke, thats for sure! There is something about the ingredients that are supposed to shrink my fat cells. One can hope! I will post the recipe at the bottom of this post.
I want to thank each of you who read here....some new, some for years now. Thank you for being here with me. You have read your way through some of the hardest times in my life. Your comments have meant so much and encouraged me to "keep coming back." You have no idea how much being able to come here and pour it all out and reason things out with other mother's who are walking similar paths to mine, has meant to me. Bless each of your hearts with something so special just for you.
Much much love to all.....
PS: And here you go.....