Friday, September 27, 2013

Sooooo, I went......

I had my first meet-up with my therapist and it was good. She is very nice. My friend who referred her to me, said that she is gentle....and she is. After a couple days of feeling like a whining, self obsessed idiot for going in and talking about myself and all of my "issues" for an hour.....I got over it and began to feel relief. And some hope. What if my girl really is on her way to being a healthy adult? Odds are that Molly will be fine, big brother and little one are doing fine....good job, great in school, relatively happy with their lives.....so what if everyone is ok and what if I really am able to work through one of the last big issues that has hung around inside of my soul for so so many years, what if the dad and I don't have to think about how we will manage a crisis, or when the next crisis will hit, what if we can focus on each other and what makes us happy?!

We had our first baby 18 months after our wedding... so we have been parenting for the majority of our marriage. Of course, 4 kids, a house big enough for all, living on one income for 18 years so that someone could be available, cars and all that they entail, car repairs, multiple stints in rehab, multiple stints in college, textbooks, tutoring, counseling when needed, clothes, proms, sports, hobbies and interests for thus said 4 kids...and we have no money left. So whatever our fun will be, it will have to be FREE or pretty darn close! And we are fine with that!

Is that a light at the end of the tunnel I am seeing today?

Whew.....
Annette


5 comments:

Signe said...

It sounds as though you have done the absolute best that you can/could have done within the circumstances that you found yourself in. You made sacrifices, experienced joy and reward. From the outside looking in, the view is one of a beautiful family living life to the fullest. I think it is important that you make the effort to do something--anything positive moving forward. You do that, even in the worst of circumstances. You're the heart of your home, Annette. Keep beating!:)

Mary Christine said...

Yes it is light! And it is not from an oncoming train!

SoberMomWrites said...

So so SO happy to read this.

And snot feel bad, the hubs and are in the same boat. I know! Let's do free stuff together!

;-)

Hugs to you my friend,
Sherry

Mrs. Dubose said...

I am beginning to see light at the end of my tunnel, too but I am still so aware of how abruptly that light can dim. (CRASH.)

I am so happy for you that everyone is right where they need to be. I say a quick prayer for you and your family every day now, since I found your blog.

I hope your light shines bigger every day. xo :)

Tori said...

We had our son 12 1/2 months after we got married plus I came with a son who was 7 when the little one was born. B was the one that needed everything from the time he was about 9 to now. Tutor's, therapist, then rehab, and on and on. I think many of us are out of savings, retirement money and anything else we had saved. We should start a blog for free things to do! That would be awesome!