Ok, the honest truth....

Sometimes I still wonder if this is just the mother of all manipulations? But 12 years is a long time to carry on a manipulation? So it must be real, right?

I waffle between compassion and feeling like I can't do this anymore.

I am left with taking each moment at face value. I only have the information I am given. I only have what I actually see before my eyes. It is not my job to dig in and uncover and do some manipulating of my own to find "the truth." Maybe what I see in front of me is the truth.

I chaired a meeting last week and my topic was acceptance. Accepting my life, my situation, as what it is today, this moment, brings me some serenity. I don't need to figure it all out. I can't figure it all out. But God can. I think I will let Him for today. Maybe.

I'm going for a walk.....

Annette

Comments

Anonymous said…
Oh, I'm so with ya!! One day at a time, right?

Enjoy your walk...I'm so ready to get outside I can barely stand it. Wind chills in my neck of the woods are at zero today! And to think tomorrow is Spring?!

March 19, 2013 at 9:54 AM
Anonymous said…
I'm right there with you today waffling between compassion and feeling like I can't do this anymore. It has all taken such a toll on me emotionally and honestly I sometimes feel like I just can't do it anymore. I too am tired of thinking about digging and manipulating to find out "the truth." Praying that God strengthens and guides us both.
March 19, 2013 at 10:44 AM
Sober Life said…
Ahh, I have been saying this the last few weeks too, I am done over-thinking and figuring it all out, it is sooo tiring. I give it all to HP! He is more equipped to deal with it anyway. LOL! Thanks for your post :)
March 19, 2013 at 10:56 AM
Anonymous said…
Wow, I feel exactly like this most of the time and seem to be getting better at.turning it over. Thank you for your post!
March 19, 2013 at 11:54 AM
Grace-WorkinProgress said…
I think all the work we do sometimes to make us a better person distracts us from enjoying the simple things that God gives us each day. I just want to have fun for a change.

Staying in my head is bad news but sometimes there is no place to go.
March 19, 2013 at 2:31 PM
Signe said…
So true! How exhausting it all is. This weekend almost did me in, and when I said (and ready to accept the result)'she's all yours, God. She's in your hands,' And I really meant it. I did feel some of the weight lift. Hard to explain but I feel as though some kind of layer was removed. It gets hard, but you are not alone in trying to figure this all out. Hang in there.
March 20, 2013 at 3:01 AM
Syd said…
Acceptance is a good thing and something that I have to be thinking about every day. So many people come into my life that I simply have to accept because I can't change them. I can take what I like and leave the rest.
March 24, 2013 at 7:37 PM
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